Do not be afraid just because your parents were

Much of what we practice as adults we learned from our parents when we were children. That’s great when it comes to good character qualities like integrity, compassion, and a strong work ethic. But it can be challenging when you’re trying to break life-long habits of fear and deceit. Here’s the good news: you do not need to be afraid just because your parents were.

Abraham’s son, Isaac, married a beautiful woman. His wife was so attractive that he feared that his neighbors would kill him just to marry her. So, when he moved into a new area, and the neighbors came inquiring, he told them she was his sister. He did exactly what his dad had done when he was afraid—he lied. His cowardly actions left his wife vulnerable. Fear will do that—we protect ourselves even if it places those we love in danger.

It’s easy to pass on our fears to our kids. Isaac’s parental example was his father (Abraham) who lied to protect himself, putting his wife, Sarah, in a similar, dangerous situation. The same happens today. There’s a good chance you inherited some of your fears from your parents. There’s an equally good chance you’re going to pass those fears on to your kids. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Notice God’s words to Isaac.

That night the Lord appeared to him [Isaac] and said, ‘I am the God of your father Abraham. DO NOT BE AFRAID, for I am with you; I will bless you and will increase the number of your descendants for the sake of my servant Abraham’ (Genesis 26:24).

God points to the past.

God reminded him that he was the God of his Father, Abraham. Even though Abraham had acted in fear, God had been faithful. The Lord had kept his promise to Abraham when Isaac was born in Abraham and Sarah’s old age. Trust is built when we look back and see another’s faithfulness.

God comforts in the present.

God gave a command based upon a truth. Do not be afraid (command), for I will be with you (truth). Throughout the Scripture, when fear is present, God often reminds the Biblical character of his presence.  Even though we cannot see him, we are not alone.

God promises a future.

God also made a promise: He would bless Isaac as he had blessed his father, Abraham. He wasn’t the end of the genetic line. There would be children to follow.

God assured Isaac that he could break the cycle of fear. When he was afraid, he didn’t need to lie. He could tell the truth and rest easy that God was with him. If his dad—who had succumbed to fear—had only trusted God when he was afraid, he wouldn’t have needed to lie.

Phil Moser is the author behind the Biblical Strategies series for personal growth, counseling, and discipleship. His men’s small group study, 4M Training, helps men apply key spiritual growth dynamics. His unique small group videos are beautifully filmed at National Park locations and are offered free of charge. They are an excellent addition to the Biblical Strategies family of resources. His works have been translated into Mandarin, Russian, and German.