How to be Courageous in the Face of Pain and Suffering

Rachel and Jacob had infertility challenges. She desperately wanted to have children like her sister, but she was unable to. For Rachel it must have felt really dark, but the Bible offers hope for how we can be courageous in the face of pain and suffering. Eventually, she had her first-born, Joseph. She must have been elated to let her husband know that she was expecting again. But this labor would be more difficult, it would bring her great suffering, and her husband would suffer as well.

At her moment of greatest pain her midwife said to her, “DO NOT BE AFRAID, for you have another son” (Gen. 35:17). The Bible goes on to add, “and as her soul was departing (for she was dying), she called his name Ben-oni; but his father called him Benjamin” (Gen. 35:18).

The midwife attempted to encourage Rebecca through her pain and suffering by helping her see the purpose—she had given birth to a son. When we experience pain and suffering, it’s easy to lose sight of our purpose. It’s easy to imagine that our purpose is comfort or personal safety. We forget that we were born for nobler purposes than simply to please ourselves. That’s the kind of thinking that got humanity into trouble in the first place.

We were not created to experience pain and suffering—we can expect it to be hard.

When sin came into the world, it didn’t come alone. It was accompanied by pain and loss. Adam and Eve experience that loss firsthand. Their relationship with God changed. He no longer walked with them in the cool of the garden.  Their relationship with one another changed too—and not for the better. One of them would stand by the other’s grave and know the pain of loss.

I’m reminded that this kind of pain is unavoidable each time I leave the cemetery after a funeral service. A pastor friend of mine was fond of saying we were not created to die; we were created to live. Without Christ, we don’t have the apparatus to deal with it properly. Death is intentionally painful—particularly for those left behind. The graveside forces us to face our fears of pain and loss. It reminds us that our pleasures, hopes, and joys are not permanent this side of heaven.

Pain and suffering distract us from our primary goal of serving others and glorifying God.

Our central purpose is to serve others and glorify God. When pain and suffering roll in, it’s easy to believe our sole purpose is to get relief. But rarely does that purpose inspire the kind of courage necessary to deal with pain and loss. Even if there is temporary relief, when the pain comes back its often accompanied by an even greater fear.

When Benjamin is born, Rachel’s midwife gives her a sense of purpose with the words,

“Do not be afraid, you have another son.” And as her soul was departing (for she was dying), she called his name Ben-oni; but his father called him Benjamin (Gen. 35:17, 18).

The reminder that a son was born was meant to encourage Rachel. But Rachel didn’t see it that way. The name she gave her son (Ben-oni) means “son of my sorrow.” All Rachel could see in the moment was her pain and loss. The boy’s father changed the name and the meaning. Benjamin means “son of my right hand.”

Your pain and suffering will be used to encourage someone else.

It’s true. This world is filled with sorrow. It’s easy to look at what might be coming down the pike and be afraid. No one would blame you. But where there’s pain, there’s also hope. As Sarah takes her last breath; Benjamin takes his first. God was busy writing a story of new life.

When Jacob’s favored son, Joseph, goes mysteriously missing for 22 years, Benjamin will be the son that encourages his father. He will literally become the son of his right hand. In her death, Rachel had fulfilled her purpose. She had provided a young man who would be her husband’s source of encouragement while he mourned the loss of Joseph for two decades.

When you’re afraid don’t lose sight of your purpose. God doesn’t waste pain and suffering. He will use yours to minister to someone else, even if you must wait until eternity to see it.  

Phil Moser is the author behind the Biblical Strategies series for personal growth, counseling, and discipleship. His men’s small group study, 4M Training, helps men apply key spiritual growth dynamics. His unique small group videos are beautifully filmed at National Park locations and are offered free of charge. They are an excellent addition to the Biblical Strategies family of resources. His works have been translated into Mandarin, Russian, and German.